It seems many of today’s world leaders didn’t get the memo that real life isn’t a Hollywood action flick.
Or maybe they’ve just played one too many games of Risk, lost, and are now out to regain their territories (and that sweet bonus of extra armies!).
Forget diplomacy and spare the innocent!
These folks are following the classic Hollywood playbook: “You send one of ours to the hospital, we’ll send one of yours to the morgue!” After all, what’s more effective than an all-out war of escalation, right?
Clearly, Hollywood’s endless barrage of explosions, revenge plots, and epic showdowns have set the standard for how conflicts should be handled.
Why sit around a table, have some coffee, and talk things out when you can pull a Dr. Detroit and promise:
It’s not about resolution—it’s about making sure you win bigger and louder. Besides, you get to tell the other country “Say hello to my little friend!” What’s more satisfying than going out with a bang?
Step 1 – The Hollywood Conflict Playbook
Hollywood taught us one thing: in any conflict, you must escalate! Whether it’s Liam Neeson promising: “I will find you, and I will kill you,” or taunting your enemies with a “Yippee ki yay, mother******!“
The solution to any problem is more violence, more firepower, and bigger explosions.
Sure, The Terminator could have tried reasoning with Sarah Connor, but where’s the fun in that?
Just keep sending robots to hunt her down—over and over again—until someone wins (or, you know, until the world is basically ash).
“It’s not personal Sonny, it’s strictly business.”
Apparently, the best way to run a government is to keep upping the stakes, ensuring that no one can back down without losing face. Sounds reasonable, right?
Step 2 – The Real World – Where’s the ‘Cut’ Button?
But here’s the catch: in real life, there’s no “cut!” The actors don’t go home, the special effects don’t get turned off, and the innocents caught in the crossfire don’t magically walk away unscathed.
Unlike Mad Max: Fury Road, where characters cheerfully shout, “I live, I die, I live again!”, in reality, people don’t get respawns.
When the bombs drop, the buildings don’t get rebuilt by CGI artists—they stay like that.
Yet world leaders seem convinced they’re starring in their own action movie, upping the ante at every turn. And why not? Riggs didn’t stop after one explosion—he asked: “What do you say Jack? Would you like a shot at the title?” It’s the Hollywood way.
Step 3: Alternatives? What Are Those?
Now, call me crazy, but what if we tried something new? What if, instead of lobbing threats like Dr. Detroit (no matter how fun it sounds), we actually sat down and talked?
Diplomacy! I know, I know—it’s not as cool as an airstrike or a heroic shootout, but hear me out. Maybe we could try not blowing things up for a change?
Of course, at first your suggestion will probably get laughed at. Talk? That’s for suckers!
But in reality, maybe, just maybe, there’s a world where problems don’t have to be solved with missiles or invasions. I guess that’s not Hollywood enough for today’s leaders?
Step 4: Sparing the Innocents – A Forgotten Concept
It seems that “collateral damage” has become an accepted term in global conflicts, but let’s face it—how many innocents have to be sacrificed before we realize escalation doesn’t work?
Maybe instead of constantly looking to one-up the last attack, we should ask: How do we prevent innocent people from becoming part of the body count? In movies, the hero walks away unscathed, but in real life, the damage lingers for decades.
Instead of playing Risk with human lives, maybe the solution is a good, old-fashioned conversation. Imagine that!
But no, that wouldn’t make for a thrilling sequel, would it?
Maybe instead of real-world escalation, we should introduce our so-called world leaders to any of the thousands of 4X games out there. So they can explore, expand, exploit, and exterminate in a world where people don’t suffer for the sake of their power trip.
The Series Finale?
So, congratulations to those who believe in the Hollywood way! Keep escalating until there are only about ten of us left, sitting around a table at the end, hashing out our differences.
I’m sure we’ll be able to reason things out once everyone else has been wiped off the map, right?
Because, in the end, why settle conflicts when you can just go scorched earth? After all, as the final survivors, maybe we’ll finally get to sip that coffee and chat things over peacefully.
Just the ten of us.
